Wednesday, December 1, 2010
This is the last part I'll write, I promise! These were super fun to write!
In other news, we are plotting-er, considering a performance in late spring. I've got cast lists written up. All of you who are performing will get a cast list and then you can come here and print out the scripts.
If any of you readers have ideas for scripts, submit them via the comments. Who will be the first?
The Airs of the Toys Part Three by Katie Schultz
(All enter. Harold and Barry sit on chairs. Manager stands behind table.)
Manager: (Sighs loudly.) This is the last time I’m going to come here and try to get something done!
Harold: Are you sure?
Manager: Yes. (Harold and Barry slap high-fives.) What are you doing?
Barry: Well, we don’t have to pay attention – or do anything, really – because it doesn’t matter. This is the last time you’ll try.
Manager: Let’s try this one more time. This company, Swindlers Employed for Tots, is considering making toy phones.
Harold: So we’ll be phony?
Barry: Certainly looks like it, doesn’t it?
Manager: Barry, could your branch of the company handle the design?
Barry: I don’t have a tree, let alone a branch.
Manager: Quit driving me up trees. Now, Swindlers Employed for Tots is also making Pretty Pink Ponies-
Harold: We have horse sense?
Barry: I thought we had this discussion about sense already.
Harold: Oh, that’s right. In our first meeting.
Manager: (To self.) Breathe deeply! Breathe! Breathe! (Inhales, exhales loudly.) Now then. Swindlers Employed for Tots is partnering with another company called Spineless Books, also known as Borders Without Borders, to produce a series of books designed to encourage kids to read.
Barry: But reading is knowledge-
Harold: And knowledge is power-
Barry: Power corrupts-
Harold: Corruption is a crime-
Barry: And crime doesn’t pay-
Barry and Harold together: So if you encourage kids to read, they’ll go broke!
Harold: That won’t work very well in this economy.
Manager: Oh well. Let’s just go on to the next thing we have to cover. Barns and Nibble provided the cheese and crackers that are in the hallway by the water cooler.
Barry: Why didn’t we partner with Barns and Nibble for the book deal?
Manager: Spineless Books suggested the idea to us. We thought it best to go with them.
Harold: Do they have any backbone at all? (Scribbles on paper, drops it on floor.)
Barry: If they’re bookworms, they don’t.
Manager: Guys! We have stuff to do!
Harold: I vote we adjourn early.
Manager: The motion isn’t on the floor! (Harold points to the floor.) All right, the motion hasn’t been entertained!
Barry: No kidding. I haven’t been entertained either.
Manager: The motion hasn’t been presented!
Barry: If it had been presented, I would have seen it.
Harold: Don’t cause a scene.
Manager: Enough! (Stomps out.)
Barry: Finally. (Barry and Harold exit.)